Misery

They should know this about me

I'm more alone and always by myself.maybe .I can't remember most of it.but I think , I had a good childhood.nothing spectacular,just good,and that's the way I like it. my _ _ _ _ _ _ _ today are merely acquaintances.All I know is,there used to be genuine happiness when I had my "%&(" around me back when I was twelve.7 years on,I struggle to become what they want me to be.but ,perhaps ,I've failed them.They don't even know who I am and they never try to comprehend what I am.They just keeps push and insult me.well I'm abnormal.please accept and help me.They always got me wrong,wrong perception,misunderstood my feelings,point of view,sense in humor,fashion style and behavior.

I have always wondered if my life is worth living.Yes,maybe I'm the fine result of both worlds.But no,I'm not the the prime of the family.Somewhere along the lines of bringing me up,my communication with my parents must have broken down because for the life of me.well.I'm just a pathetic young men with a heart of "fake stone".This is my cover.They don't even know .just a dot.that's it.luckily I have friends and "someone" who maybe understand my feelings.thanks a lot .your existence makes my life a lil bit of light.well...I need a shoulder to cry on.,without them maybe I'll ended up my life with suicide.too much pressure.I hate myself and I hate who I am now.Is it my own fault?? I'm still wondering who should I put the blame on.But I know they always going to blame me.yep.I'm the black sheep.it's ok.I hope I don't act the way they act towards me in the future.dilemma. yep. I wish I had never be born.but this is the reality.whatever it is.i'll survive and i know.no one perfect.i'm ok.
please Ya Allah help me.

.i will change but I know this misery would be forever seated untouched in my heart.

well.nak wat cmnew.air yang dicincang xkkan putus.
redha and tawakkal~ maybe ini cabaran yang tuhan bagy.
sabar and cool ok
u can do it. :' ).
well.life isn't perfect it is a mess.